Captain’s Log 27 March 2020
To see yesterday’s post, click here.
Two weeks have gone by since we started staying home. In that time, we have had some great moments and some difficult ones. As I think on it, it hasn’t been all that bad. We have had to change so much about our daily lives but at the same time we have adjusted pretty well.
Not spending time with friends and family in person has been taken over by using various apps like Zoom to hang out virtually. In those moments and on the phone, I have found that everyone is having the same struggles. The amount of stress in being thrown together 24-7, the need to be social, the amount of dishes everyone is suddenly faced with, suddenly becoming your children’s teacher with no experience in teaching, finding motivation to do any work, the difficulty in not being able to have and do things that were routine, the worry and fear about this unknown sickness, those are universal. And by universal, I mean people around the world are all yearning for the same things. Whether my friends reside in Italy, China, South America, or the US, everyone misses their normal lives.
So too, the good stuff is universal. The projects you suddenly have time to actually finish (not just start), the cleaning out and organizing, the memories being made, and the precious time together with your nuclear family are immeasurable in their benefit.
Yesterday was so very fruitful. I did so much work that hadn’t gotten done in the past two years. It felt glorious! It was also exhausting. As I looked at writing this Log yesterday, I was overwhelmed and so Mark stepped up to help me. I hope that when someone reads this, they see that it is good to acknowledge when you aren’t able to do something and how good it is for someone to step in and take care of it. On that note, I am thinking I may only write 3 or 4 of these a week as I am able because, believe it or not I have a lot to do!
Today I came to a conclusion (or rather something like a conclusion) about homeschooling the boys. As I see it, nearly every child in America (and much of the world) is missing most or all of this quarter of school. They are largely being taught by well meaning parents who have no clue what they are doing. I am fairly certain in some areas of school Mark and I are not teaching things correctly. That leads me to think it is stupid for me to teach my kids something that has to be un-taught and then re-taught later by their capable, professional, and intelligent teachers. Some aspects I am able to help them through and others cause so much anxiety and uproar that it is unhealthy for our family.
Finding the motivation to work in a (much) less than ideal learning environment is another issue. The Illinois State Board of Education has stated that students’ grades should not be hindered by their work coming from this period of time. So why then are we doing this? Obviously, I don’t want my kids falling far behind and some things can be learned (at least cursorily) simply from reading a textbook but if it is causing undue strife in an already stressful situation is it really benefitting them? Would it not be as beneficial to teach my kids math by making a recipe and trying to figure out how to double it or triple it? Wouldn’t this time be just as well spent putting what they already know into practical application? Shouldn’t their English class be journaling about what it is like to live through Quarantine? Wouldn’t it be a great lesson to show them how capable they are of taking what they have learned and putting it into practice? This is all taken from the standpoint of having a 7th grader and a 3rd grader. I am sure if they were in high school, I would feel differently. But in the end, why are we spending so much time getting so very little done and causing (something akin to) agony when we could be focused on teaching life lessons, instilling or reinforcing confidence and capability?
Today, for homeschool I wrote out a list of questions for each of the boys to answer to gain their deeper thoughts on life in Quarantine. I have asked them to answer one or two each day. Liam has to answer in 1-3 sentences and Caleb has to answer in 3-5. I think their putting to paper what they know and understand, love and hate about this is far more important than answering questions 1-10.
Please don’t think badly of me for asking such questions, it is simply where I am at right now. Education has always been a priority in our home. We wouldn’t have taken our children to 50+ countries if we didn’t value learning. Mark is a professor—professors don’t just value education they are education just like my kids’ teachers. He and I are constantly studying something. We read ridiculous amounts of books. But winging homeschooling seems like a lesson in failure to me today. I love and appreciate my boys’ teachers. They work hard for pennies, they put thought and care into the lessons they prepare. But I am incapable of taking over their duties with any kind of confidence and my letting them down seems to be what this is set up to do.
I am grateful for the time we have had together to learn more about one another, to make memories, to laugh with one another and to rely on one another. I am grateful for the opportunity to do things which would not be done and only serve to weigh me down with guilt. I am grateful that I can stay home and help defeat the spread of the covid-cooties.
Until next time friends…
Jocelyn